March 9, 2003
Don’t you just hate it?
You consider yourself to be an above average computer user. Maybe even - dare I say - a Power user? Your skills as a diagnostic technician rival even those of the Techs that get paid to do what you figure out on your own. You are, The Warrior.
You have fared well in many a computer glitches, system crashes and virus attacks because you are armed with an incredible arsenal of knowledge and experience - hell you even one up the toll free phone Techs by telling them what you've already tried. A sigh escapes you as you hear the phone Tech flip from Help Screen 2 to 34...
Tech support...I spit on them....
In your mind you've already spent countless hours walking through the repair process. Calculating how much time it will take to re-name a network, reload drivers, reformat a hard drive or terminate an extension conflict with extreme prejudice. You do this in your sleep, while you're driving, while at work. It consumes your every thought - but thankfully you can multi-task with the best of them.
Finally after an incredible amount of brain gymnastics...you formulate your plan of attack and prepare to launch your offense. Slowly, methodically, you creep towards the unsuspecting troublesome computer and sit down. You crack your knuckles - a devilish grin creeps across your face...
- "No, this computer will not beat me"
- "I, am the master of technology"
- "Computers were built by man"
- "I, am the Sentient being"
- "I THINK, THEREFORE I AM"
...and then you push the reset button on back of the wireless router and the wireless network is up and running - everything works. Wait, how could it had been that simple?
A audible klaxon sounds - A red warning light flashes off to the right in your brain...RADAR LOCK...NO...NO...NO...TOO LATE...you think of your loved ones...a whimper escapes your mouth, "Mommy...."
Suddenly an air-to-air CSM (Common Sense Missile) obliterates your posturing, intellect and knowledge into millions of pieces - like the aircraft of an Iraq pilot blown out of the sky - foolishly flying through the U.S. patrolled No fly zone....
The wireless network for the iBook is up and running again....thank god my reserve chute deployed.
G-man